Life's A Journey

Have you ever considered how many roles you play in this life.....? It gets pretty complicated and overwhelming when you stop to think how many different roles we have over a life time from birth to old age.

As I look back, over more years than I care to admit, I realize I have a personal "History" that tells a story of my life's journey. I can see the progression from childhood to adulthood. Good decisions as well as bad decisions, happy times as well as heart breaking times, successes as well as failures all together... comprising my life! They all add up to making me the person I am today. Above all else, I consider myself to be a Christian first, among the other roles I have filled......student, R.N., wife, mother of 4 boys and now a grand mother!

I was raised basically by a wonderful "Nannie" who taught me Christian principals from an early age. She sang songs of God and his love for children and read from a big blue Bible story book. After my Bible story, she would remain while I prayed and asked God to bless those I loved, especially her! She was 65 when I was born and a great blessing in my life even today. Every Sunday, my sister and I were up, dressed and set out to walk to Sunday school. It was quite a way from our house, but we didn't mind and sometimes a friend would stop and give us a ride. Those early years and the teaching of God's love were important to my growth as a Christian. It served me well.

My Dad died the beginning of my senior year very suddenly. He was the first person to die in my family, and every two years I lost someone significant.... my "Nannie" died two years after Dad, followed by my sister two years later. Since I was taught to love God and trust him, I can see He never failed me during those darkest moments in my life. He also gave me quite a wonderful man to love, who became my husband and brought much joy into my life as long as he lived. We struggled as most young people do when they start out, but now I can see how God used those struggles to teach us and direct our path and "grow us up"! There were things we both needed to learn and He taught us and even disciplined us in his own gentle way, even though it didn't seem so gentle at times! He taught us the wisdom of setting goals and the hard work plan to achieve our goals. Looking back, I honestly feel, He was always with us. We got our educations completed, prayed to start our family, got involved in church work and were truly blessed as a family. Time will not permit me to dwell on how very gracious God has been in our lives.

We lost our first son after 40 years of marriage....he was 33 and a victim of heart and kidney failure. It was devastating for us, but he was a strong young man and he knew he didn't have long to live. One day, he looked at me and said, "Mom, if I die before you and Dad, I don't want any sad songs and slow walking, I want my funeral to be a celebration of my life!" He was not afraid to die. Only by the grace and love of God did we survive the loss of our first child. God was with us and gave us strength to continue on day by day. Exactly six months later, God took my husband home very unexpectedly and I felt I would surely die myself, but looking back, I can see that God wrapped me in a blanket of healing love from family and friends and in due time He healed the raw pain of separation from those I loved so dearly in this life.

Whatever the future holds for me, I strive daily to leave in God's hands desiring His will for my life. He has allowed many special people to influence me and I am grateful for the love and friendship and encouragement of those people. Oh, I still have times when things mount up and strive to overcome me. I have learned however; God is never so far away that he can't hear my cry or see my tear drops and feel my pain. He is a part of my life. I know God is in control even when things tend to spin out of focus. If I just reach out, pray and have faith, I know He will answer in His own time. I have learned it may not be the answer I want, but it will be the answer I need because He loves me!

I guess what I am trying to say is, we are all part of God's creation and He loves us and desires for us to love Him and obey His will for our lives. He suffered and died to pay our sin debt in this life and has prepared a place for us to spend eternity with Him. I can't help feeling that is what our life on earth is all about ...not just acquiring the temporal things of life, but also preparation for our eternal life. We all have a choice to make and a role model to follow..... that of our Lord, Jesus Christ! Are you preparing and what will your choice be? Where is the road you walk taking you and what awaits you at the end of your journey? It is time for you to consider. Your journey could end tomorrow!

Jan